the Swishing Mechanism

I quit my job, thus I need to be more frugal; I am spending money by the fistfulls. I need to get boxes so I can start packing the things I have deemed necessary for transitioning into the next chapter of my life. I need to think about next week and the week after, and the week after that and all the other weeks that we believe already exist in the having-always-already-been-cooked enchilada of space-time. I need to stop and think before I grind another handful of coffee beans. I need to make final connections with my friends before I disappear into the ether. I need to say HEY and YES OF COURSE and I KNOW I KNOW and WHEN and WHEN and EVENTUALLY. I need to stop thinking I am the boy from the Willa Cather short story Paul's Case, because I am spending my own money and all stupid and ugly things do not slide from me when I hear the serenade from Rigoletto. I need to have future prospects. I need to have hope for future prospects. I need a new perspective on things. I need to spin and dry. I need to fly cheap and safe.I need an itinerary, don't I.